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100 Reasons Why It's Great to be a Woman
100 Reasons Why It's Great to be a Woman
[list=1]We can get laid anytime we want We never have to buy our own drinks at the bar We piss sitting down so its easier to pass out on the toilet when you're drunk We get out of speeding tickets by crying We get out of speeding tickets by showing a little cleavage or leg We can sleep our way to the top of the class We get to shop at Victoria's Secret We can marry rich and then not have to work We never have to pay when we go out on dates Men take us on all expense paid trips- all we have to do is sleep with them Men light our cigarettes for us Men hold the door open for us We pout better (those puppy dog eyes always work!) We're cuter We lie better We're better manipulators We always end up sleeping in the bed when we fight with our other halves- you guys get the couch We always have food in the fridge We don't worry about losing our hair We always get to choose the movie We dont have to mow the lawn We dont have to take out the garbage We dont have to paint the house or walls PMS- yet another excuse to bitch at men Cosmopolitan We can con our way out of anything - not just dig ourselves deeper into a hole Men unlock our side of the car first- a real bonus when its cold PMS is a legal defense for murder Men are like tiles, lay em right the first time ya can walk all over em forever We can masturbate more in a day than men 2 words- multi orgasmic We dont have to constantly adjust our genitals Sweat is sexy on us We never run out of excuses You guys may get to think about sex 200 times a day, but we could be having it that often Doggie style - that way we get to watch the game too We get expensive jewelery as gifts that we NEVER have to give back We get candy, flowers and jewelery all the time cuz men fuck up so often We can give "the look" that will make any man want to cower in the corner Women are cleaner Women have more than one erogenous zone (in case you guys didnt know) We're better arguers We dont always have to think with our genitals Massage!!!! We're better parents We never have to sit home alone on a weekend night There's never a shortage of ready, willing and able men We're flexible When women get pissed we dont destroy property or hurt people - we just take it out on the world in general because we can Menopause- thank god we're not capable of having children after we're 50 Menstruation- just another excuse to use so we can say "no" to sex Men in uniform There is no penis envy We can just roll over and go to sleep after we masturbate because there's no messy clean-up It generally takes us less to get drunk We have a higher tolerance to pain We often get to cut in line Most women actually look good in short shorts- men DONT Better tips Women who dont wear underwear are considered sexy and wild, when men do it, its rather disgusting We have mastered civilized eating - we don't embarass our friends or make loud bodily noises in public Women can go a day without showering or shaving and not look or smell disgusting - thank god for long pants and perfume! We can connive men into doing our homework, writing our papers or carrying our books anytime we want We dont have excessive amounts of body hair We dont spend 45 minutes on the toilet Men will pay us for sex Smoking the seeds in marijuana doesnt make us sterile We can throw a punch at a man and not get hit in return Men may fantasize about having sex with more than one woman at a time, but we can have sex with an entire football team at once if we want Men walk on the side of the sidewalk closest to the road so that if a car hits us, he gets hurt not us Women sweat less Women smell better When women make their boyfriends mad, we don't have to waste money on flowers or cards - a blowjob and sex fixes all Men are more often serial killers, thieves, rapists and cheats Women dont get the humor in the three stooges Women have three accessible holes We don't get embarassed when buying tampons We're better gossips We have better fashion sense We're better shoppers We dont have to make fools out of ourselves to impress a man Our friends dont pick on us if we arent sleeping with anyone Men don't know what our 'girl talk' is all about (and I'm not gonna tell you) We're all sittin on a gold mine- we know it and use it to our extreme advantage We dont have to drive when on a date An ugly woman can use makeup and get a new hairdo to become presentable - ugly men are just fucked Women can use the old "that mark on my neck is from a curling iron burn" line Women know how fake it Women look better naked We know that rhythm doesnt only pertain to dancing When women are short, we're petite, when men are short, they're just short Women do less time for violent crime Women dont have to worry about not being able to get it up An oblong vegetable is all we need for a good time any night Women's conversations generally consist of more than just "uh huh, yep, ok, then bye" Women don't need an excuse to be in a bad mood Women never have to see combat The remote control is not an extension of ourselves Women are sexier We can get laid ANYTIME, ANYWHERE, ANY WAY we want it![/list=1] |
Re: 100 Reasons Why It's Great to be a Woman
Wow Bratt, that is really ... don't know how to swallow that.
I sit here for a whole 2 minutes reading between the lines. Infact I would like to share with you a prayer that also goes well with woman who consider themselves as being great. It goes something like this; Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong, One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, When he says he'll call, he won't wait weeks. I pray that he is gainfully employed, And when I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to "How big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to no end, And never attempt to hit on my friend. And as I kneel and pray by my bed, I look at "who" you sent me instead. Amen.. "An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have, the older she gets the more interested he is in her!" :blush: |
and here i thought PMS stood for Prime Murder Suspect
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guess women do have it good!! well, I'm sure there's 100 reasons why it's not good either, but that could go for both sexes!!
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That list would be way too long!!!! LOL :twisted: |
I think the list of why it sucks to be a woman is much longer....good lord....sometimes it frustates me to be a woman....
#1 reason why it's great to be a man.....they can pee whereever, whenever satnding up.....!!:mad: |
Huh real right :bonk:
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That`s very cool,Bratt!
It was very funny! It`s so good be woman!!! :D |
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