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Old 07-03-2003, 05:15 PM   #1
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Default The Dangers Of Midget Porn (this is whacked)

Ok, here’s a doozy…I’m sitting around working a couple days ago,my phone rings, and it’s some laywer on the other end:

“I represent Gameworks…a woman ordered a DVD from your “Midget Porn of The Month Club” and would like to get her money back. I am calling the FBI and the Atlanta DA to have you investigated for mail fraud because you are using my clients name (Gameworks) in conjunction with your website. We will also sue you in court for trademark infringement!”

So tell him, “I am not affiliated with any “Midget Porn of the Month Club” – why are you calling me? What the fuck are you talking about?”

He says, “On the letterhead you sent out with your DVDs – it has the URL of your website (http://www.xxxmidgetporn.com) and also the name and address of Gameworks (also, apparently some adult company). We are faxing / mailing a cease and desist and will pursue the matter in criminal court.”

He had gotten my number from the WHIIS info.

So I tell him, “Yes, I do won that site, but…for one, I don’t sell any DVDs mailorder at all. All of the traffic from that site is sent to an affiliate (Siccash) – I have no idea what you are talking about. Two, in about five minutes I could make up some letterhead that says that I own Yahoo, but it doesn’t mean that I own Yahoo…:

So then this prick says to me, “For purposes of argument, let me say that I don’t believe you. We have a good amount of evidence to the contrary.”

I tell him to fax me everything he has, and that my lawyer would be in touch.

Sure enough, when I get the fax someone is using my URL and a graphic from the front page of my site on their letterhead, but I have NO idea who these people are. The best guess I can make is they used my site because it is #1 for “midget porn” on Google:

http://www.google.com/search?sourcei...&q=midget+porn

So today, I have to wake up early in the morning, go to my lawyers office, and give him thousand bucks to start sorting this SHIT out.

I tell you – if I was 13 years old and someone was looking into my future and saying, “When you are 31 you will be threatened my the FBI over you midget porn activities…” – I would have laughed my ass off.

This business is too much for me sometimes.

Does anyone out there know anything about Gameworks or the Midget Porn of the Month Club??
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Old 07-03-2003, 05:29 PM   #2
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Don't sell midget sex short.
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Old 07-03-2003, 05:47 PM   #3
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I knew there would be some bad puns over this
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Old 07-04-2003, 12:08 PM   #4
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Why don't you let them call the FBI and let them tell Gameworks it's someone using their name and yours to commit fraud. If you're not doing anything wrong you shouldn't need to pay your lawyer to straighten it out.
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Old 07-05-2003, 04:44 PM   #5
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So gameworks revealed their "shortcomings" ...
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