Good VS EVIL

twinkley · 10-18-2002, 01:56 PM

Subject: Good vs Evil

In the beginning God populated the earth with broccoli and
cauliflower and spinach, and green and yellow and red vegetables
of all kinds, so man and woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then Satan created Ben and Jerry's and Krispy Creme. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And man said "Oh Yea." and woman said, "And another one with lots of sprinkles." And they gained 20 pounds.

So God created the healthful yogurt so that woman might keep
the hourglass figure that man found so fair. Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane, combined them, and created the Eclair. And woman went from size 10 to size 18.

So God said, "Better try my fresh green salad." Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing and garlic toast on the side. And man and woman unfastened their bulging belts.

God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chips, and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And man & woman gained more weight and their cholesterol went through the roof.

God then brought running shoes so that man & woman might loose those extra pounds. Satan gave them cable TV with a remote control so man would not have to toil changing the channels. And man and woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and gained more pounds.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them.

God gave them lean beef so they might consume fewer calories and still satisfy their big appetites. Satan created McDonald's and it's 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?" and man replied, "Oh Yea! And super size'em." And Satan said "This is good." and man went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery. Satan created HMOs.

The battle continues......

Evil Chris · 10-18-2002, 02:06 PM

LOL... is this a mini-series?
I want to see how this turns out....

JTW · 10-18-2002, 02:53 PM

...and then god created pornography...

10-18-2002, 02:58 PM

...and the rest is history!

lol

ric knows nina · 10-18-2002, 08:40 PM

then people start creating genetically modified foods to keep costs down and suck the nutrients out of previously helathy foods. sneaky bitches (think that's from the New Testament)

Evil Chris · 10-18-2002, 09:13 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ric knows nina
then people start creating genetically modified foods to keep costs down and suck the nutrients out of previously helathy foods. sneaky bitches (think that's from the New Testament)

word for word? What ver do you have Ric?

Darin · 10-18-2002, 11:55 PM

Sorry, I don't believe in GOD.

Zebra · 10-19-2002, 06:02 AM

I have incontrovertible proof that Twinkley IS the devil!
Do not doubt me. She means to corrupt us all, just watch!

twinkley · 10-21-2002, 11:08 AM

Me? The Devil? (Chris, you need an angel smilie hehe)

NO WAY!

I am sweet and innocent and all that good stuff....

Sugar and Spice and everything nice....

hehehehehe

twinkley

10-21-2002, 03:01 PM

I won't believe what they say about you Twinkley!

twinkley · 10-21-2002, 03:55 PM

LIES!!! ALL LIES!!!

Well, except for the good stuff, thats true

hahahahaha

much love!

twinkley

Zebra,

Do you want to compare corruptability points? hahahaha I am sure you wouldnt exactly be in the "heavenly" catagory hahahaha

Zebra · 10-21-2002, 06:39 PM

but Twinkley.. I never said I was a good boy! You should know that by now!

Evil Chris · 10-21-2002, 07:27 PM

Twinkley... Devil?

or Angel?

Funbrunette · 10-21-2002, 07:40 PM

Well, I'd pick Evil over Good any day!

BuggyG · 10-21-2002, 10:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Zebra
I have incontrovertible proof that Twinkley IS the devil!
Do not doubt me. She means to corrupt us all, just watch!

Well, I little corruption never hurt anyone. Well much that is. And am not one to never have been corrupted (ok this is part where ya suppose to see that imaginary halo over me head)
So I'm open to it. Let her corrupt me!! I'll take her on!

modF · 10-22-2002, 01:38 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Funbrunette
Well, I'd pick Evil over Good any day!

Could you imagine, "Ohh look there is FB and GoodyGoodyChris".

It just would not work!

Zebra · 10-22-2002, 03:53 AM

GoodyGoodyChris... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh shit, that is funny!

Raya · 10-22-2002, 04:00 AM

I have a nice pair of red horns under my long red hair. I had a halo but I set it down so I wouldn't get it tarnished and someone stole it. SIGH!

BuggyG · 10-22-2002, 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by modF

Could you imagine, "Ohh look there is FB and GoodyGoodyChris".

It just would not work!

Seriously. I don't get the same feeling from it . It doesn't have that, ummm...how can I say it. Errrr....how can I transalte, ummmm... what the french say, missing a certain "I don't know what"!! hehehehe

twinkley · 10-22-2002, 04:00 PM

Oh shit! That was yours Bree?!?!

I don't currupt people... i merely suggest they try new, fun things.....

hehehehe

twinkley

BuggyG · 10-23-2002, 12:18 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by twinkley
Oh shit! That was yours Bree?!?!

I don't currupt people... i merely suggest they try new, fun things.....

hehehehe

twinkley

DAMN!!

And I was hoping to get some tender loving corruption from ya. bummer

ric knows nina · 10-23-2002, 02:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Evil Chris

word for word? What ver do you have Ric?

it's the modern translation, called tv guide

who knows this lyric:

"I'd rather be famous than righteous or holy any day, any day, any day"

dig through your 80's