I have a problem, I need a QUICK solution!

[Funbrunette]

Well to me it qualifies as a problem as you know I'm going to be wearing next to nothing this weekend on the beach but I had a little accident last friday and fell (actually tripped on my dog) and got the worlds WORST black bruises on my legs it looks horrible Ok so we've all established I'm shallow and would love to find a miracle way to get rid of the ugly bruise...Anyone have any ideas? Chris did mention me going topless on the beach to divert the attention away from my bruises...lol

I'm serious any ideas? I heard vinegar, massage...Anything? Leg amputation...lol Why do these things happen when you're just about to leave on holiday and I'm so proud to show off my new white string bikini Big mean bruise!